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Monday, December 8, 2014

Visitors from Another Blog Here at My House



Dawsey, Cleo, Einstein, Michele


This weekend, I have had four friends who have helped me immensely. They carried simple things, not too heavy, but too heavy for me. Plus, I cannot carry things over and over. They sorted stuff I have not been able to sort for years. It seems that I have let things go, but the truth is, the effort, the walking, the lifting is next to impossible.

At no time did I lose control of what stayed and went. I worried about that lots before they came. I did relinquish control of the kitchen to Cleo. She did things I never expected. If she had asked, I would have assured her she did not have to do that, like clean off the counter to the corner. Now, I have a box of things to sort as I sit instead of standing and leaning forward.

Michele is a very down-to-earth woman rearing wonderful children, wonderful humans. First hand, I have seen her humor and her honesty. And, I did not realize she is tall. She and Rose look like my younger daughter. They saw pictures and agreed. I have been amazed by this fact since I first read her blog.

Cleo is a very take-charge person. She spent two days washing my dishes. She made decisions on her own, but did come to ask questions. The only thing I did not allow her to do was return dishes to their place in the cabinet. She probably would have done it mostly correctly, but that search for one thing would have frustrated and tired me. So, she agreeably left the dishes. Now, my whole kitchen is covered with lovely, clean, and DRIED dishes. I swear I will not use another dish that must be washed until I have water in the house. She even took the dirty ones out of the dishwasher and washed those. Since she was running out of room, I showed her how to use the oven to place dishes to air dry. Now, I have to remember not to turn on the oven. This makes seven weeks without water.

Cleo is the official dishwasher for their home. She certainly has gotten it down pat. I remarked that as a teen, I complained about doing dishes. When Cleo tackled the job, I felt very confident she would complete the task, but she went beyond what I expected.


Einstein

Einstein is a very handsome young man. VERY handsome! He helped in the sorting, tossing, and put together something I will tell you about later. I can see where he got the name Einstein. He did what I needed to have done without a grumble or the least bit of evidence that he would rather have been doing something else. He fed my chickens and counted them for me. O course, the chickens did not leave home when I had three young people to chase/herd them home for me.

The pile of trash behind Eistein is what they removed from my home and carried to the road. My garbage needs to be on the road on Wednesday night. Exbf will be here on Wednesday, but he would be hard-pressed to be able to repeatedly carry loads to the road. Three children made short work of this. Of course, they carried it out during the days here.

Dawsey is a joy and a good helper. I think he helped with the feeding and counting of the hens. He had a smile on his face and interesting things to say, a good conversationalist. He picked up things I could not. Of course, a gallon of water is rough on me.

I tried to do some things with my left hand because the problem was immediately to the left of my chair. Then, I could barely move my left arm without my fingers to my neck tingling. Things a baby could hold were impossible for me to hold up. The pain in my shoulder was incredible. This continued so that now I cannot hold a glass in my left hand and cannot raise my arm even to shoulder level.

They witnessed my physical deterioration as the day wore on, but I tried to hide it. I had to use a walker eventually. Of course, just sitting upright caused my great distress. The most injured knee swelled all the way to my ankle. Thankfully, the next morning swelling had subsided. always have my feet up on the ottoman when I sit.

On Friday, I kept my feet on the floor too long instead of putting my feet and legs on my ottoman. Saturday morning, I tried to be more careful on Saturday. About 8 weeks ago, I reinjured my left knee and have horrendous pain in my leg, knee, and down the outside of my lower left leg.

During the week before they came, Michele and I talked on the phone. I did not want to witness her horror or pity when she found out I had no bed or bedroom any longer. I told her on the phone, chattering away, telling her that now I just need a single bed, not a king-size bed as I have had since 1980. She said she had a daybed she no longer used, brought it to me and set it up in the space we cleared for it.

This is where Einstein shone. He had a set of some sort of tools and put the daybed together in short order. I was impressed. I still did not have a mattress, but it beats sleeping on the floor as I have for the last six weeks. I will get a mattress today. No, I cannot afford it. The nearest Craig's List mattress is 20 miles away. No one is selling a mattress in our local paper with ads only.

There is a mattress factory here that sells seconds from the factory. My only problem with all this is that I do not have a vehicle to move a mattress and cannot think of anyone who does. Oh, the people next door do, but that is not an option. I do have ideas of whom I can ask to help me with the mattress moving. And, I hope I can find money to replace this utility money I am spending.


Einstein and Cleo
 
 
 
 
 They are standing right inside my side door in front of the door and picture window. This room is an added-on room from the fifties, incorporating the back porch. The trim is very plain, unlike the 1902 construction of the rest of the house. You can see the back and side of the daybed. It is very sturdy, unlike some cheap daybeds I have seen.


Dawsey, Cleo, Einstein, Michele
 
 Michele agreed that I am not a hoarder as some have suggested. I am someone who lost six room and had most of it dumped into three rooms. Plus, 9/10 of the boxes in the room were empty. They carried many of those out to the road since rats had been in or around them. Yuck!
 
 
When things were unearthed, I gladly gave them up for the most part. Some I gave to her or the children. Einstein gladly took the stop watch off my hands. I have never been able to use a stopwatch for whatever task I have at hand. I want it and need it. But, I just decided to give it up and admit my limitations. I am no dummy with electronics or gadgets or directions, but I have admitted defeat--Temporarily. For my mystery shopping I must time things to the second. So, I will use a watch with a second hand. Michele laughed at  the huge watch I have to time things. Yes, it is huge!
 
 
As I said, I refuse to cook until I have water. I started out 7 weeks ago with the sink full, the dishwasher full, and a fever. I was taking antibiotics and very ill. So, things went from bad to worse to worst around here. The water situation degraded the cleanliness and added to more stinky dishes. Actually, they turned the water on for me to do dishes, wash clothes, bathe and wash my hair. Then, about 8 hours later, they turned it off. On another occasion, they left it on for four days, despite my begging into the voice mail for them to turn it off.
 
This Wednesday when exbf will be here, I have ham to heat, greens to open, and sweet potatoes to bake. Then, that night the church has the weekly dinner. So, I dodged that bullet of cooking for him this week. I will be slicing ham for me to eat this week even though the salt in the ham makes my knee swell even more. I have paper plates, tumblers, and finally bought plastic bowls. All the plastic utensil I just keep around were dirty, so Cleo has washed all those. "Cleo, my offer stands of a home here." lol
 
I don't have to cook for exbf, but I feel I cannot just take his kindness and help without at least feeding this lifelong bachelor who does not cook. He is very easy to please, eating leftovers if that is what I have for him. If I cook a crock pot of chicken the day before he arrives, that is not really leftovers, but planned leftovers. It has become increasingly difficult for me to cook and do things we do during the day. We eat out when I ask to do so. One day, on his own because he could see my pain, he said we could go out to eat. Oh, I think I was sitting down, crying because of my problems when he said not to worry, we could just go eat at Ruby Tuesday...my favorite place in this town to eat with the best salad bar ever.
 
The dishes in the kitchen were stinking when they came here, before Cleo jumped right in. The commode has been stinking since day 2 of this seven weeks. Once a day, I pour two gallons of water in the tank, sort of knocking down the stench when I flush. I put a cleanser in the commode once a day and scrub. It is never good in there. The chair I am sitting in is actually going to fall down some day and has its own rotten odor...lol....too many people have sat in this chair after working in the yard. When I have complained or put something over the chair, implying the person was ruining my furniture with grass-mowing-middle-of-the-summer sweat, I have been portrayed as a person who thinks more of a chair than a human. Well, at least one-third of the stench in this house has gone. I will shop thrift stores for a replacement for this chair. Anyone who offered me one would be great. Of course, it must fit me, my back, legs just like this chair bought in 1970 fits me.
 
Friday, Saturday, and Sunday Michele drove the crew around the block and got about a 10, possibly fewer vinegar jugs and drinking water jugs of water for me. They went to my friend's house, the one with the turquoise and orange porch décor, and used his hose in the front flowerbed. As I said, I cannot bend that far and hold it while I fill a jug multiple times and carry it times multiple jugs.
 
This weekend has been a killer for me, but well worth sitting up for as long as I did. I needed something and Michele insisted she bring children and help. They actually uncovered a whole chair and sofa. This will never happen to me again. Of course, there are two more rooms that need to be routed out and sorted, thrown out, donated or just stored in a storage unit I have.
 
When we talked on the phone, Michele objected to my giving them food. When she arrived, I told her I go to multiple food banks and that some of the food is not anything I can eat. Plus, there is too much of some items.  For instance, cooked spinach comes right back up. I do love all cooked greens and love raw spinach, so she got spinach in the can. Or, I have too much of some things--tomato products, including spaghetti. And, pasta. Yes, I could not go so often, but I never have too much whole grain bread, meat, or canned pineapple...lol.  However, these are not often in the box. The persons running the food banks know we go to multiple ones. They are not government subsidized, so there are no problems. The people say that if we don't like or cannot use a food item, to give it to someone who will eat it. I did. So removing excess boxes was a great help to me.
 
 (By the way, I know my neighbors' mini blinds work. This weekend, the ones facing my house were opened for the first time in the two years she has lived there. If anyone wants to "visit" me, let me know...lol. The only time my neighbor was here, she rushed over to tell people working in my yard what not to cut! The junk privet shades her back window. I suggested she go and get trees from Lowe's to plant to shade her house. I am very much allergic to privet, but only realized this last year what was bothering me.)
 
Thank you Michele, Cleo, Einstein, Dawsey. I love you all.
 
My weekend was spent with affable people--wonderful woman, extraordinary children, and getting some help. And, I was able to wash my hair and shower for the first time in 8 days.
 
This is totally NOT edited, but I may do that over the next few days.
 
 
Your turn
Have you ever needed help and had someone entirely  unexpected offer and actually show up and do the job.

35 comments:

  1. I agree Hopefully Michelle and family will read this. You guys are wonderful!

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  2. Beautiful angels to your rescue, Linda. This post made my heart shine with love and respect for Michelle and her crowd of true loving human beings. They know the score when help is needed, don't they? Now if only the 'water fixit crew' would be so generous.
    Best story I've read. If only the so many disabled round and about could be so lucky to know a Mystic crowd. Thank you for sharing your blessing with us/readers.

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    Replies
    1. Sissy,
      I just need help much closer...lol. She offered. I did not ask. So, that means more.

      Delete
  3. You had angels in your house this weekend! As Sissy said, thank you so much for sharing the time the Mystic Mud crowd spent with you. Sissy said it best.

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  4. Linda, I jjust sent you an email, please email me back so I know I got it right :)

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    Replies
    1. I think I just did. I took a five hour nap. No, really, I got into bed with no mattress because I was going to sleep walking, called exbf, and was whining to get off the phone.

      Delete
  5. What a wonderful gift!!!! I don't think that I have heard of such kindness and that her kids helped so willingly shows what kind of person she is.

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    Replies
    1. Sonya Ann,
      The woman who volunteered to rake my leaves last fall had children who opposed her and talked right in front of me about how they did not want to rake leaves. So this was a nice change in kids' attitudes. She is rearing them well.

      Delete
  6. You mentioned your son is a teacher. Surely he must have the funds to help with your water? Do your children know you are in such need, or are you opting not to inform them due to reasons you may have?

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    Replies
    1. I worry about this too. I know that I would take a loan so my mother 2would not live like this, I brought my mother in law to live with me because she needed help. Please get your kids to help, it sounds really rough. you should not be sleeping on a floor for crying out loud.

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    2. Had no idea you had a son. Are you not on good terms? I agree that I would move my mom or my MIL into my home and it is tiny.

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    3. longtime, When I finally got a diagnoses of my back problems, I told my son. He said I was just telling him to make him feel sorry for me. His father is behind all this attitude. Would you like to read the new blog about all that when I have the strength to even start one?

      Amy, He does not care or would just call DHR and make sure they removed me from my home. The ex and his wife would fuel that fire.

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    4. If you haven't done anything wrong to your kids, then why not give them the benefit of the doubt and give them to opportunity to help you. By not even informing them of these dire straits and asking for help you are just assuming they will not help, which is not fair to them and could be a valuable opportunity lost. If my mother, even one i wasn't fond of, came to me and said, "Hey, i know we have issues, but i am in great need, could you please help me, i will be so grateful" I would drop everything and help the person in need. No questions asked. You really should consider giving your adult children the benefit of the doubt.

      Delete
  7. That is wonderful; I love their heart in helping you.

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    Replies
    1. I love their heart and their whole beings.

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  8. That was so wonderful of Michelle and her kids. They are wonderful people and it was so kind of them to come all that way and help you out.
    I pray that you get your water fixed and feel better but based on what you have said above and your posts from the last few months, I feel compelled to say this. No one ever wants to give up their home or independence but if your physical condition is deteriorating and is not going to improve and you're having trouble living on your own, then you might think about making some changes. Maybe sell the house and go into an assisted living community ?? I don't say this trying to be critical and I hope your health comes back but what you described above was the shape my grandma was in earlier this year and we had to sell her place and move her to an assisted living place. She was upset at first but is now doing great. If you don't get better, please consider that as an option. It brings tears to my eyes reading about you having such trouble getting around and being in constant pain like that. Good luck !!

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    Replies
    1. I will recover. How old was your grandma?

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    2. That's good to hear that you're getting better. My grandma was much older than you (91). It was very hard for her to sell her home and move to an assisted living place but it was obvious to everyone but her that she could no longer care for herself properly or live all alone. After a few weeks, she loved her new place because she now has new friends and isn't all alone and she is eating well (even cooking a meal had gotten to be too much for her and she was dangerously thin).
      Different situation than yours and I'm glad that you are on the mend.

      Delete
  9. I had no idea you were living this badly. How wonderful that you got the help you needed. God bless your angels.
    I hope things improve for you in the future.
    Good luck.

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    Replies
    1. Cindi,
      The water bit is new. The house getting so stacked up has been gradual due to loss of other rooms. Thanks.

      Delete
  10. God bless those angels. Please pass on my thanks and applause to them. Many times in my life, people have shown up unexpectedly to help me or have called when I was in need. I'm convinced that God sends them, and He has sent me at times to help others.

    Love,
    Janie

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    Replies
    1. Janie,
      Oh, they will read this. I have absolutely never had anyone show up or call when I was in need. Today, I tried to get a mattress. I was treated so rudely. You know how old I am and know my problems with back. But, I do not appear old or so disabled as I am, at least not early in the morning when I do not need a walker or cane. Well, maybe Michelle can attest to the old bit. I know I am old, but some people are shocked at my age.

      I helped my 94-yr-old neighbor for about 15 years before she died. Except for my neighbor around the block who takes out my garbage when I ask, no one seems to really care except for the latest news which I am sure goes right back to ex.

      Delete
  11. So glad you got some help from some wonderful people. I know it is hard to admit when things get away from you. I am so sorry it has gotten to this point for you.
    How much will the mattress cost you? Patti from ca

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    1. Patti,
      Oh, I admit it alright! It is just that why complain on my blog too much.

      The mattress that is new is $279. The mattress that is free is from those that sit on the sidewalk, always free. Of course, they sit there in rain and have cats seeking refuge. I am handicapped by not having access to men and a truck, except one I would hire. The mattress factory here in town did sell seconds to the public. Today, they were just rude and would not buzz me in. Calling is harder to get a deal. Talking in person is better.

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    2. Oh goodness. Have you thought about ordering online with free shipping, like from walmart?
      I was just browsing there and they do have some options...http://www.walmart.com/ip/Spa-Sensations-8-Memory-Foam-Mattress-Multiple-Sizes/12542630
      The idea of you sleeping on the floor makes me really sad, glad you are off the ground but the next step is definitely a mattress. Patti from ca

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    3. Patti,
      You are so right about getting the mattress. It seems like a mattress needs to be tested. I hate foam. I tried a new one today and the pillowtop thing sort of suffocated me. I feel like the mattress is wrapping around me and I cannot turn over. I will go look at the site and see. Thanks.

      Delete
  12. For Michele....
    Thank you so much for taking time to help Linda. Such a loving gesture. Truly amazing after all you have been through.

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    Replies
    1. This is from Patti from ca...there are two Patti's that post here and that is how Linda identifies me. ;)

      Delete
  13. I am pleased for you, that you have met those wonderful people. It's not often that we hear of people that are kind and helpful to others, wanting only to help for nothing in return. I'm glad I came here today and read this. Take care Linda.

    Barb.

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For the present, I am taking comment moderation off the blog.