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Thursday, October 20, 2011

Jamming with Sasquatch

He said he would hug his jam he made.


told him to pose proudly with his jam he made. He said, "I will hug it." Of course, he did not pose, and I missed it.


Here is how it happened
Charlie had a gallon+ of muscadines. He wanted to make jelly because he eats jelly with a bagel every morning. Then, he decided he did not want to get rid the skins or anything because it was at least fiber for him.  So, he wanted jam. I offered to bring my canning equipment and teach him how to can. He was going to copy ALL my pictures with his sooper dooper scanner. THEN, he invited a woman he had never met to come by.....grrrr.

Thinking she would probably tell me all about how she canned and that mine would turn out wrong, I was livid. He told her on the phone that I was picky and not to talk to me. LOL...he had been telling me that every woman he knew said that putting sugar in strawberries ruined them forever for making strawberry preserves. ??? This woman was very nice. She laughed when I explained I wanted to teach him with no interference. Then, the next woman could teach. As it turned out, she did not know how to can, so all was well.

I told him I did not think he wanted to can jam bare-chested because he might get hair in the jam. He shrugged his shoulders and said he was eating the jam, so he did not care. This evening when exbf heard this and I told him how hairy Charlie is, he said I should name this post "Jamming with Sasquatch." Driving the back road is bad enough, but when I am laughing and crying, it is really dangerous.

Part of the gallon of muscadines


Part of the muscadines, halved and seeded

I told him to have this done when I arrived. The muscadines were not even completely thawed. He hated using the knife to get out seeds and was slow. Finally, the hurry things along, I used my clean thumbnails to removed seeds, two to most grapes.
He is not happy or very productive at this point


hmmmm



All I said was, "Look this way." I did not meant that way.


Seven pint jars from a little over one gallon of muscadines

Charlie filled all the jars, wiped the rims, dried the flats, and screwed on the bands. Of course, he mashed all the grapes, did all the stirring and timing. The last jar lacked an inch being full enough to put in the water bath canner. We put in  boiling water to fill that last jar. He will eat that one first. He was counting the pings as they sealed. They jars all pinged within minutes, not the hours the books state.

Once, I reached to grab a jar to show him how to tighten the seal. Charlie could not believe I could hold the hot jar that just came from the canner. He declared....over and over.... that I had Teflon hands.

He complained that the muscadines were so tiny. His hands are so large. However, he is accustomed to handling tiny computer components. Maybe we should can wires next time.

Crushing blow
So, that is how I spent my day until I went to the orthopedic surgeon and learned that, indeed, I do have a torn rotator cuff. I cried a bit on and off.

Food
Then, I went to a food bank there  and got a ton of food that I must process or cook. There are about 50 lbs of bananas, 3 whole wheat bread, 1 foccaccia bread, 1 artisan rosemary bread, 1 whole wheat nooks and crannies, 3 whole wheat bagels, 6 bell peppers, 6 lemons, 1 honeydew, yogurt in date (little cups), muscadines, apples, leaf lettuce, mess of green beans, one onion, fresh cooked Spanish rice (was hot) with meat in it, two gallons milk, 20 lbs potatoes. NO CANS. No meat. I left the eggplant! Charlie helped me carry things. Okay, he carried everything.

I will freeze the bread items and milk. Potatoes and muscadines will be canned. Onion, apples, peppers and bananas will go into the dehydrator. Lemons will be juiced and the juice frozen in 1/2 cup Ball jars. The honeydew will be chunked and frozen for smoothies and who knows what. The rest will be cooked and eaten.

7 comments:

  1. This post has so many funny lines in it. I chuckled. Canning wires might top the list. Very funny.

    I am sorry to hear about your shoulder though.

    And the Sasquatch that you can with has got nothing on the Sasquatch that I can with... All the men in Matt's family basically have pelts. Your exboyfriend was right though. It made for a hilarious post title.

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  2. BLD,
    Confession--I loooove pelts. As long as a guy does not have hair on his palms, pelts are gooood. Breathe, Linda, breathe! Keep your blog G-rated.

    Exbf has better pelt than Charlie, so he did not mind hearing the details...lol.

    Charlie aka Sasquatch, never wears anything but shorts in the house, this pair is about eight inches longer than the pair he had on when I first met him at his house.

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  3. This post made my day with the wit and humor:O
    So now what on the shoulder? I hope there is an answer for you that is simple.
    Excellent take from the Food Pantry.

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  4. Hi Linda, I wanted to thank you for visiting my blog and leaving a comment. I must say, I like your post with Charlie doing the canning. He is a natural!

    What a fantastic food bank you have! I'd love to get that kind of food.

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  5. katlupe,
    Charlie is a very good cook and funny. It was nice of him to go along and help me with food.

    Write me at my email address at the top of the blog and maybe I can help you find a food bank like this one.

    I like your blog.

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  6. LindaM,
    Surgery is the answer. I cannot live like this, barely able to lift my arm or hold anything or pull or lift.

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  7. oh this is a good entry. thank you for the look-see.
    Mr. Charlie AKA Sasquatch inspires me to try some canning but I plan to wear clothes AND an apron as I am certain to spill lots and don't need no piliferous canned goods.

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Okay, hoping the annoyances have gone away.